A Bar With Me And You

Bit of a ‘stream-of-conciousness’ poem, this one. Flowed out of me (such an image) this evening. Feel free to let me know what you think.

We met upon a moon-shy night,
The future so unsure;
We counted steps upon the road,
To basement bars front door.
The first response of eyes so met,
A shiver balls to bone;
We couldn’t know from this night on,
If we’d ever be alone.
We talked until the wine ran out,
But the bar refused us more;
And as the rain remained afloat,
We danced out through the door.
Not dwelling on the falling drops,
Nor chilling winter breeze;
We knew that life so seldom gave,
Such moments sweet as these.
As the moon bid sky farewell,
We talked and laughed and kissed;
And every star that faded so,
Beared witness to out tryst.
Who could have guessed a simple call,
Could lead to such a place;
A chance encounter engineered,
And granted with such grace.
The start of something sweetly pure,
A life of different views;
All started with rain soaked drink,
In a bar with me and you.

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14 Responses to A Bar With Me And You

  1. Nice one Simon. I enjoy the rhyme of tryst and kissed and the image of the wine, rain and love all flowing together. Oh and the engineered and pure lines are both inspired and a great coupling too.

  2. Twindaddy says:

    Loved the rhythm of this piece. If this is something you just whipped together I’m not worthy of something you put effort into.

    • Simon says:

      Thank you my friend. But stop with the ‘not worthy’ stuff… I’ve read your work, remember, and it’s (as we say in the UK) the dogs bollocks

  3. I think that your structure aand rhyme work well in this piece. A beautiful poem reflecting on love.

    • Simon says:

      Thank you Chris, I always appreciate your positive comments – yours, as well as others, keep me writing when I think it’s all too much hard work 🙂

  4. fibee5 says:

    So romantic, loved every word. My only criticism is it ended too soon.

    • Simon says:

      You’re so perceptive. That’s exactly what I thought. I think my inspiration left me just at the wrong time and the flow slowly dried up. I may revisit this. Or, if you like, feel free to add to it…

      • fibee5 says:

        I admit that is a very tempting idea but I am not sure it would flow smoothly as our styles may vary but thank you for the amazing offer. I hope you revisit this.

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