Unfathomed Reasons

And through the murk I search,
for these unfathomed reasons why you,
in your tender grace,
would love me.

I wait for the punchline
to this cruel joke,
the revelation why someone like you,
in all you are, would gift me this love.

Rushing to reassure that,
I do not doubt your love,
more that I doubt my own worth,
my own deservedness.

All I have is a hope,
a grasped at faith that you will not see
that which I cannot un-see,
in me.

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11 Responses to Unfathomed Reasons

  1. If this is true, you are very hard on yourself. It would be a strange world indeed if everyone loved the same person, everyone loving the same characteristics. What one person may see in another is not what everyone else may see.
    This is a very sad poem. I cannot conceive of anyone being so hard on themself as to feel unlovable. Self-perception is a curiously faithless friend if it deems it so.
    I hope this is written from an imaginary perspective. It makes me too sad. Everyone is deserving of love. Whether they believe it or not.

    • Simon says:

      Thank you for the long comment, it’s nice when someone takes the time to write something like that, showing that they’ve actually thought of what they want to say. Thank you, again.

  2. It would be impossible not to respond with thought at such words. Really, they are cruel to self and must hurt others who do love you. Parents, children, friends….all people who know or see something different from such an illusory sense of self. ‘Un-seeing’ is not really an option if life is to progress with any hope or faith. As I said before, too sad.

    • Simon says:

      Sorry I made you feel too sad then…

      • My sadness is for anyone who feels this way. And now Fi…
        I see in the words of people who write here on WordPress tremendous warmth and character and I do not understand how they cannot see this in themselves. So many people down on themselves. I am so sorry for this. I want to hug every one and tell them what I see, what I believe, what I know.
        I am not sad for myself.

  3. fibee5 says:

    I don’t know how many times i feared that my husband was somehow not seeing the real me, half hoping he wouldn’t and half wondering how he couldn’t.
    ‘a grasped at faith that you will not see
    that which I cannot un-see,’

    I would cry fearing he would leave me, yet half hoping he would as each time i searched my ‘murk’ i would find no reason
    ‘And through the murk I search,
    for these unfathomed reasons why you,
    in your tender grace,
    would love me.’

    This poem really spoke to me in way’s I can’t really explain and are very personal but thank you and sorry if i’m reading too much of myself into your wonderful work.

    • Simon says:

      Fi it’s very flattering that anything I write would have such an impact on you, personal or no. I’m glad you enjoyed it, and thank you for reblogging it 🙂

      • fibee5 says:

        It certainly brought up old thoughts and memories 🙂 I felt i had to reblog something that had that impact on me 🙂

  4. fibee5 says:

    Reblogged this on Fi's Thoughts and commented:
    This spoke to me and I can think of no better reason to share it.

  5. 1jaded1 says:

    Echo in my heart, I’m sorry.

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